Celebrating National Read Comics in Public Day

Just like I hope all of you are. Currently, I'm enjoying reexperiencing Bucky's journey to being Captain America while enjoying a cool iced coffee at my favorite coffee joint in the LA area, Swork. What a great way to spend a Sunday.

How about you? What're you reading today?

I Hate April Fools Day...

And here's why:



I found this on Reddit today and my gut tells me this can't be real. But, in a week that had The Black Panther decked out in Team America gear I don't know what to think.

Is the big surprise in Marvel's Fear Itself #3 (something that's been hinted at by Matt Fraction to no end) a world changing thingamajig similar to what will probably happen in DC's Flashpoint? I'm half thinking that might be the case, because the alternative (assuming it's real and not a fan drawing) is just... They wouldn't, right? I mean, I know he's has been hanging with those flithy mutants for a while now, but that wouldn't make him strap on an X. Would it?

Ugh. Stupid April Fools. Anyone have any thoughts?

Am I the only one hoping it's the return of Spidercide?

Happy Saint Patrick's Day...

And make sure your green is visible from all angles.

Kyle Rayner pulls a Hal Jordan in Green Lantern #68, courtesy of Ron Marz and Paul Pelletier.

Abraham Lincoln's Excellent Adventure

What would President's Day be without a nod to the most excellent adventure of the most bodacious Chief Executive dude the United States of America has ever met. In other words, it's time we check out Evan Dorkin's masterpiece, Bill And Ted's Excellent Comic Book #11.



The story starts with an example of the perfect way to spend this non-present giving holiday: A full on Planet of the Apes marathon. Say what you will about the quality of those movies, the continuity is top-notch. Call me a weirdo, but any movie franchise that you can watch in an endless loop is a one for the ages. Anyway, our titular heroes head to this never-ending film fest with Death to give him a much needed education.



It's here that the boys discover a disturbing truth (via movie poster, of course): Their friend and super cool dude Abraham Lincoln was assassinated. Makes you wonder how these guys passed history... oh. Wait. I remember.

Anyway, so the boys do what any sane rock stars with a time machine would do and decide to save Abraham Lincoln. But first, they need a plan.



To quoth Mr. Preston: Those are Totally bogus plans! Poor Lincoln.

The boys, bereft of good ideas to save their long deceased history partner, opt fo the simplest, yet most effective, plan: Kidnapping.



After nabbing Lincoln from what would quite possibly be the worst performance of "Our American Cousin", the boys travel back to the future to find things have changed horribly. Without Lincoln's death to pull The Union together, it quickly descended into another, more devastating, Civil War. Worse, without Lincoln's death there would be no Wyld Stallyns, no Rufus, and no time travel (but it's best not to think of the paradox that last one brings).

Wholly devastated the boys have a total Spock-in-Wrath-of-Kahn moment and realize that Lincoln has to die, a decision that he doesn't necessarily agree with.



With Lincoln falling back into his typical selfish persona (/sarcasm), the boys prepare for a life with no music, babes, or sunday funnies. Until, that is, they look to their left and remember they have a time machine. Handy little things, those are.

In true Bill and Ted Tradition, the Stallyns travel back to stop their past selfs from picking up Lincoln in the first place. If you're thinking about the paradoxes or obvious disregard for Bill and Ted's time travel rules at this point, you're doing it wrong. Even though, I'm right there with you.

The boys don't seem to notice though, and ask the obvious question:



Violence. Is there anything you can't solve?

The past boys deterred, all that's left is for both parties to head back to the future and cry over their decision while hoarding all the five dollar bills they can. Fortunately, Death controls the booth and takes Bill and Ted to a place to put their spirits at ease:



So there you have it. Today while you're thinking about what the Presidents did for the country, good or bad, just remember that when you get to heaven, ol' Honest Abe will be waiting for you with a brewski and a good time.

I'm off to get a head start. Happy President's Day!

It's A Very Merry Franken Christmas!

There's nothing that says Merry Christmas to me more than FrankenCastle dressed as Santa. It's as if he got my letters and came to deliver happiness in person.

I hope you too, dear reader, got everything you wanted from Santa this year, including all that joy and goodwill malarkey.

And for those of you who aren't of the Christian persuasion, I hope you have a fantastic day as well. And that there are plenty of seats left at the local chinese place. :)

Now if you excuse me, I have a few more presents to enjoy.

Picture courtesy of Neill's Blog, home of some of the most fun amazing art anywhere on the interwebs.

No Bill Tonight

Sorry kids, with Christmas kicking into high gear I wasn't able to make it to the store today, hence no new comics. It's just as well, I only had one book coming out this week anyway.

Also, I'm going dark for about a week as I travel across the country to spend Christmas with the FutureInLaws. It should be a fun time, but will have limited access to things like scanners, comics, and time to craft my fine blog entries.

However, I'm not just going to leave for the year without giving you something. To help get you in the holiday spirit, here's a little holiday cheer from a galaxy far, far away...



You guys be good while I'm gone, okay? See you in about a week.

Weekend Matinee: A CHRISTMAS STORY

Is it too obvious? Well too bad, you want Christmas it all comes back to this gem eventually.

Anyway, I'm sure if you're anything like me you've heard of and or seen this movie thousands of times over by now. Yes, A Christmas Story, the classic tale of what it's like to be a little boy around the biggest holiday ever (assuming you're of the Christian persuasion).

I'll tell you, I think I've only scene this movie start to finish once or twice, but somehow I still know it like the back of my hand. As a matter of fact, I think it would be against my traditions to watch it start to finish at this point. Drifting in and out of the different scenes, waiting for that one moment that you remember being totally awesome, and then flipping the channel to something else, now that's the true way to enjoy this movie.

So without further ado, here's one of my favorite moments.

Weekend Matinee: THANKSKILLING

You'd think that a Thanksgiving themed horror movie starring a foul-mouthed murderous turkey would be awesome. Just what the holiday needs, even.

You'd be wrong.

Everything about this movie seemed primed to be an instant cult classic: Cheesy effects, a fun story, just the right amount of nudity, and of course, lots of gore. Unfortunately the creators do everything they can to make the movie as un-fun and un-clever as possible. It's like they started with a nugget of a funny idea and just straight up refused to make it anything more than that.

The main offender in the movie is the killer turkey. It's an awesome idea that's just squandered with simple, unfunny quips and lackluster acting. Having the turkey pop up screaming, "Now you're gonna die, Motherfucker" just isn't as gripping as I want it to be. Maybe I'm a snob, but I like a bit of cleverness from my horror movie villains, even if it's just cheap and easy puns. I'd take Leprechaun Back 2 Da Hood over this hunk of turd any day.

So why am I taking the time to showcase it here? Because I want to warn all of you to steer clear. This movie is totally NOT worth your time and you'd be much better served watching the fake Thanksgiving grindhouse trailer from Eli Roth on repeat for 90 minutes than watching this movie suck your soul away.

That said, here's the trailer to Thankskilling to illustrate my point.



Now leave me alone, I have left overs to eat.

Happy Thanksgiving!

In honor of this most glorious of holidays, here's a clip from what must have been the BEST THANKSGIVING EVER!



Robots! Death! Taco Pie! Rambling stories about radioactive chickens! It's what I strive for each year to be, but just fall short of. Maybe next year....

Weekend Matinee: SAW

I don't get the Saw movies.

I mean, I get it: Jigsaw puts people through horrible events to make them appreciate life with a renewed vigor. It's a pretty clever motivation, the deaths are pretty elaborate, and it really changed the notion of what a horror movie was. I get all that, and kudos to the franchise for pulling it off. What I don't get, is all the hype.

Until yesterday, I thought the Saw movies were all pretty basic with each new installment telling effectively the same story over again and again. Then I read this article on Overthinking It. Clearly, I'm missing something because what I've seen of these movies, they're horrible. And I mean that in every sense of the word.

As a brief aside, I recently worked on Scream Queens 2, the VH1 reality show where 10 hopeful actress vie for a role in the newest Saw movie: SAW 3D. As expected on a show like that, there was a lot of talk about how revolutionary the Saw movies were. "It's the biggest horror franchise ever," "You never know what Jigsaw's planning until the last frame of the movie," etc, etc.

Unsurprisingly, this level of hype infected my brain and I started wondering if my inclinations on the franchise (based on half watching the first installment) were wrong. Maybe it was the best horror movie ever. Maybe I was just too up my own ass to give it a chance. So I did.

And it was more horrible than I remembered.

The fast cutting, the random sound effects, the over acting... it was just bad.

But now, after reading that article I feel that tickle in the back of my brain about Saw. I'm doubting my convictions again, and I shouldn't.

So to help me remember how bad those movies are, here's a big grisly montage of all the deaths that SAW could muster. Obviously, things might get a little bloody, so be prepared...



Ah... Much better.

Read Comics In Public Day!

Just a reminder, if your going out today don't forget to bring a comic because it's Read Comics In Public Day.

I know it's easy to feel self conscious exposing yourself like that, but it'll be good for you. Just be confident in yourself and everyone will be jealous they didn't bring a comic too. And be friendly while you're at it, you never know, you could convert someone.

Me? I'm thinking of going to a coffee shop with my copy of Action Philosophers, or maybe to the park so I can reread Scott Pilgrim. All I know is that whatever I read, I want it to be something that I can actively and effectively discuss and recommend if a passerby is curious.

What're you going to read in public today?

Merry Christmas!

May all your wishes be granted by Santa and his Infinity Gauntlet, or at least until he goes mad and destroys the universe.

Happy Holidays everyone!

Today is our Independence Day!

Hey Hey, happy Fourth of July everyone! I hope y'all are doing America proud today by either BBQ-ing, deep-frying, drinking, blowing stuff up, destroying communism, bearing arms, throwing tea into a harbor, or any combination of the above. If you're out and about, or just staying in and watching Star Wars on Spike I hope you have a glorious holiday!

I'll be back on monday, but in the meantime, here's the best most inspirational Independence Day speech ever (even if it is about killer aliens)