Thunderstrike Just Got MORE 90s

I think it's fairly apparent that I'm a fan of 90s Marvel.

From the artificial angst and the constant grimaces, to the leather jackets and dark sunglasses, the 90s was a very... special time. And as the years have gone by, the books have just gotten better. Well, better in an MST3K kinda way maybe.

Anyway, lately I've been intrigued by Thunderstrike. After rereading the first issue, I found myself pretty stoked for the character and the new series. I mean, sure it's cheesy and written by Tom DeFalco, but I'm sure it won't be that bad. Right?

At least I thought so, until I saw this in the Marvel January Solicts:



It's like they're actively trying to get me to not read it. Don't get me wrong, I think mohawks and lighting are as awesome as the next guy, but this is just... not right. He looks like a he's in some kind of deranged Kid N'Play/Poison cover band.

Sigh.

Well, I'm sure it'll be a fun read in 2020.

Tony Stark's Big Board of THE FUTURE!

As I mentioned yesterday, in Avengers #5 there was a huge timeline that hinted at the future of the Marvel Universe. Let's check it out one more time, shall we?



Maybe not as vague as the DC 'Future hints', but still pretty cool nonetheless.

Anyway, the way I see it, it's my duty as a blogger to address these hints and make shocking/horrible guesses as to what they pertain to. Let's do this thing, starting from the left and moving right.

Siege - I think I know what this is, and I didn't like it. Moving on.
Captain America Reborn - Which I finally read, thanks to the trade being released this week. I think this is pretty self explainatory.
What did Cap See? - Cap saw martians attacking and all kinds of dead heroes. I'm thinking it might be the Ultron War (which the future Avengers are stuck in), if it isn't some random martian attack.
Nine Worlds in Disarray - Isn't this what's going on in Thor right now? I'm pretty sure...
Heroic Age Begins - And so it did. I think it's kinda weird that Siege is before Captain America's return on the board, when it was clearly the other way around.
Three - The new Fantastic Four Storyline. My money's still on Sue leaving (read: getting dead) the team.
Hope Returns - This was Second Coming. I guess the X-Titles are set a little bit in the future.
Spider on the Horizon - This one's probably Origin of the Species. Unless it refers to Peter having a baby. Or, in an off OFF chance, to Arana becoming Spider-Girl.
Man without Fear - Shadowland. Again, it looks like this is set a bit in the future.
Throwbacks - I think this is related to the next one, and involves the return of all those dead heroes in the Chaos War. Wait... since when did the Chaos War become Blackest Night?



Chaos - I mean seriously, it's an attack of the Chaos God, not the god of death. Why are all these dead heroes being recruited to fight him. Weird. Also, this is clearly referred to here.
What is where Asgard Should be? - K'un-L'un is moving on up... Either that, or the people of Broxton, OK are in for a fight.
Five Lights - The new, and apparently dangerous, mutants that popped up after Second Coming. Again, weird that this is here in the timeline and not sooner. I knew the X-Men were kind of out of synch with the rest of the Marvel U, but this is crazy.
9.9.9 Who is worthy? - And I'm guessing of those five new mutants, only one (or half of one) will survive. I bet it's the cool one...
Master of Kung Fu - The next story arc in Secret Avengers? I really doubt that Shang Chi is going to get a push...
Nova Antiquus - The long awaited appearance of Ol'Timey Nova? Yes! Bring on the top hat and monocle!



Academy Traitor - It's totally Hazmat. Or Veil. I never did trust a girl who was all hot air. waka waka waka...
Return of the King - Dormammu is coming back in a big way. Look for him in New Avengers by the end of next year.
The Drumm of Revenge - And Brother VooDoo will be involved. I'm guessing on the bad side...
Night Falls - Looks like Night Thrasher's return will be short lived. He is coming back, right?
Iron Lad (Re)turns - The Young Avengers Vision will change "back" into Iron Lad after Tony remembers he can rebuild shit and puts the original back together.
All Hope Lies in Doom - I hear this is a line from the Fantastic Four series. I hope it involves the Basement of Doom in the Council of Reeds (as in Richards, not saxophones)



Schizm - Civil War part 2? Be still my heart. It won't be though. It'll probably be the followup to the Bogan storyline from X-Treme X-Men that everyone's been waiting for.
H:1 Stark Resiliant - Does this mean that Invincible Iron Man is waaaay out of synch with everything?
Where's Wanda - I think I know where the Young Avengers series takes place. That explains how Steve is in the Captain America costume. Poor Bucky, I hope he goes to a nice prison.
Galactus Seed - Galactus is gonna bang the planet. Either that or it's a plug for the new Galacta series that'll die on the vine.



Fear without Man - Daredevil's rebirth. Or future Tony was having an existential crisis.
Steve's Vision - Apparently whatever Steve saw in his vision was way down the line, but not the Ultron War. I guess we should plan on Martians.
Yesterday's X-Men - The return of Beak, Angel (the insect one), Thunderbird (the Indian [no, the Indian Indian, you racist!]), and Xorn. Woo!
Ultron War - Ultron returns for a reunion with his father (Hank Pym), mother (Janet Van Dyne), mother-wife (Jocasta), Son (Vision), Weird Son Clone (Iron Lad, see above), Wonder Man (for kicks), and M-11 (Because Agents of Atlas have to show up in everything). Then, after a few drinks, Hank and Ultron start to fight and Ultron decides to destroy the world. Aren't family reunions the best?



Born to Burn - The Human Torch melts through a condom and knocks up some floozy. His baby is just a ball of fire and poop.

Phew.

There you go, my totally 100% (in)accurate predictions for Marvel's future. I'm sure I'll keep you posted with "I told you so"s just in case you forget how awesome I am.

Thor Strikes SDCC

Guess what popped up online today? If you read the title of this post, I'm sure you have a pretty good idea.



Looks pretty awesome, I think. However, I still think Thor is going to be a really hard sell and/or might be a big ol' bomb.

It's nothing against Thor, or his fans, but I just just don't see him setting the pop culture landscape on fire. The weird mythology, the faux-Shakespearean English, the crazy magic stuff, it all adds up to a less than mainstream experience. We'll see what happens in May, I guess. Here's hoping I'm wrong.

UPDATE:
Well, looks like it got pulled down, too bad it was awesome while it lasted. I'll keep my eyes open for another link and repost it when I find it. In the meantime you should go enjoy this gallery of Thor stills.

The Real Ending to Blackest Night

SPOILERS AHOY!!!!

A final follow-up to my Blackest Night predictions.

As I'm sure you're all aware, I made a bet with a friend of mine that Blackest Night # 7 would end with Hal becoming the White Lantern, poised to save the universe from the threat of Nekron.

I lost that bet. Stupid Sinestro.

So today the final issue of Blackest Night was released (much to the chagrin of Tom Brevroot, I'm sure) and what happens?

Sinestro totally fails attempting to save the universe, only to have this happen:



Hal becomes the head of the White Lantern Corps. SON OF A BITCH!

I'm going to have to talk that steak down to a taco dinner because that is some serious grade-A bullshit right there.

Just thought you all should know.

The Blackest Night Bet

If you recall, months ago I made a bet with a friend of mine regarding the penultimate issue of Blackest Night. In a nutshell, I put a steak dinner on the idea that Blackest Night # 7 would end with Hal becoming a White Lantern.

Today the issue finally came out and, well, it looks like I was wrong. But just barely.

I don't want to totally ruin the surprise, but if you're curious here's aspoilerific image.

So, anyone know of a cheap steak place in LA?

The Ending of Blackest Night

I made a bet last night with a friend of mine regarding the end of Blackest Night.



I'm betting a steak dinner that the penultimate issue of the Blackest Night series will end with Hal, in complete blackness, putting on all the rings and bursting through the darkness with a piercing white light.


"Huh, what?" You're sayin'. Let's look at what we know:

- The emotional spectrum of the universe is split into 7 different colors
- White light, when shone through a prism, splits into the different
component colors
- Hal Jordan is on his way to having a history possessing each of the rings
- Blackest Night is supposed to be the culmination of plans set in motion
during Green Lantern:Rebirth
- Hal Jordan still needs to be redeemed in the eyes of Corps.
- Geoff Johns LOVES Hal Jordan and has a tendency to cram Hal's greatness
down your throat.

Makes sense, right?

In a story sense, Hal has two guys he needs to outshine in the eyes of the Corps: Kyle Rayner, the Torchbearer and Sodam Yat, Ion. The later being the host of the Green Lantern's Mascot (basically), and the former being the guy that kept the green flame burning after Hal destroyed the Corps.



If Hal can harness the entire emotional spectrum, then he'll truly be the greatest Lantern (regardless of color) of all time and regain his top spot in the annuls of history.

ugh.



I liked Kyle better.