Friday, December 25, 2009

Merry Christmas!

May all your wishes be granted by Santa and his Infinity Gauntlet, or at least until he goes mad and destroys the universe.

Happy Holidays everyone!

Friday, December 4, 2009

The Obligatory Platypus Robot Dark Reign Tie In

I can't stop thinking about Dark Reign.

Which is weird, because of all of Marvel's recent events, it's the one I haven't been able to connect to. I feel like it lacked direction, drive, and a general cohesion that all the other events have had. And yet, here I am unable to think about everything else.

Don't get me wrong, I kinda dig the idea behind it: The bad guys win and change the world to their sick whims while the heroes are forced to watch from the gutter. It's the original Thunderbolts plan, just perfected and successful. It's just... not good.

Well that's not right, because there are some great things about it. It's more that it has the trappings of a big event, with no driving force behind it. That's what bothers me: I don't feel like it's going anywhere

It's probably because it's driven by Bendis, who excels at great ideas, but seriously lacks in execution (I'll elaborate that point in a future post, I promise).

That all changed this morning when I read Siege: The Cabal, the kick off for the next big Marvel event, conveniently called The Siege.

Against all odds, I totally loved it.

It not-so-subtly reminded me of the Illuminati one-shot that kicked off Civil War three (or so) years ago with the crumbling of this elite group but with all the characters twisted for the dark side.

Finally I'm enticed for the future, I can see the end coming, and I can't wait to see these villains finally get their comeuppance.

Unfortunately I know what's going to happen. The run up to the event will be awesome, and that first issue will be fantastic, but slowly the book will run out of steam and ultimately end on the standard unsatisfying and open-ended way Bendis ends all his storylines.


Well, I'll revel in the excitement while I can. Join me will you?

Monday, October 5, 2009

Venom is a Slut Part 1

Size matters not when it comes to the sluttiness of Venom. He won't devour your world, but he'll certainly suck the life out of it.

Friday, October 2, 2009

So that's what Nick Fury was hiding.

Remember that cockpit I spotted a few months ago in Secret Warriors? The one I wrote about here?

So it turns out it wasn't a tiny Nick Fury, nor some kind of tiny alien, and it wasn't even some crazy super-villain conspiracy. As of Secret Warriors # 8, the pilot in that cockpit is none other than Phobos, the adolescent God of Fear.

Leads me to wonder, just how small is Phobos? Or just how huge is Nick Fury?

Personally I think it would have been better it if was a Tiny Nick Fury....

Monday, August 24, 2009

Things I love: Peter Parker: Spider-Man

As any long time Spider-Man Fan knows his books in the 90s were pretty terrible. Not that any of us really realized it, I know I didn't, but on a whole the books were pretty bad. It was all angst, anger, and apathy as Spider-Man became simply The Spider and regressed to just a mask without another identity. It was pretty gnarly there for a while.

All this happened, mind you, right when I started reading comics so I never really got to experience this quippy, fun-loving but put upon Spider-Man that everyone seems to dig. It made it very easy to swear off Spidey as a no fly zone when I got back into collecting after a few years of hiatus. I didn't want to read about massive conspiracies or the super-angst or clones. I especially didn't want to read about clones.

Then a funny thing happened, Marvel launched their Ultimate line. Curious, and able to read issue for free on at the time, I started reading some of Bendis' issues and they were pretty great. I thought to myself, "Self, these are good because it's not the real Spider-Man, the real Marvel U stuff can't be this good." But oh how wrong I was.

Around the same time Straczynski was getting all the accolades on his Amazing run, but the really good stuff was under the radar on Peter Parker: Spider-Man by Paul Jenkins. And here was where I discovered how great a character Peter Parker was.

There's no better example of this than Peter Parker # 33, where Pete heads to a Mets game to remember his Uncle Ben and it's one of my favorite issues ever.

A brief aside: I recently read this post on Everyday is Like Wednesday about the Paul Jenkins run on Peter Parker, in which Caleb derided the run calling it overly depressing and not the right way to do a Spider-Man book. One of the books he called out as majorly depressing was Peter Parker # 33, this is meant as a rebuttal.

The issue is basically a big monologue from Peter talking about the annual tradition he and Ben had to go see the Mets play. Except every year they went, The Mets found a way to lose which gave Ben fodder for a life lesson, much to Peter's dismay.

With each passing year, they mets always find a new way to lose which kinda puts a damper on Peter's enthusiasm. Dragged out for what would be Ben's last game, Peter finally tastes the sweetness of victory and finally understands what Ben's big speech was getting at all those years.

It's a really sweet story that gets to the heart of who Peter is. For all the years I read about him as a kid, I never got that Peter was a lovable loser. The guy who would keep trying even though the worst things always happened to him. You know, the things that make him a hero. Paul Jenkins really humanitized and personalized Peter's story for me. it wasn't sad and depressing that it was the anniversary of Uncle Ben's death, it was a celebration of Ben's life and really honored the memory.

A lot of Jenkins' run revolves around the bond between Peter and Ben. For the first time, I really understood their connection and why he meant to much to Peter. and along the way Ben became less of this proverb spouting icon and more of fun, loving Uncle that Peter would never want to stop honoring.

The run isn't without it's problems, the multi-issue arcs are a little shaky at times, and a few of the done-in-one stories are a bit heavy handed, but when the issues are good, they're near classics. If you ever need to show someone the greatness of Peter Parker, you should find an issue from this run and you won't be disappointed.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Your Monthly Dose of Throg

Throg proved he was the best at what he does this month by finally assembling the latest Avengers team:

And then proceeding to lay a good ol'fashioned Asgardian smackdown on the mad Titan himself, Thanos.

And all was right with the world. Unfortunately this is the last time we'll se Throg for a while, his miniseries is over....

Lucky for us it was picked up for a full series come 2010!! WOOO!!!

Also, if you're in the mood for a fight tonight, head on over to Spacebooger and check out their Friday Night Fights Finale where yours truly is in the running for the grand prize... Twice!!

I think you should all head over there and let them know how awesome that Scud fight I posted was.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Daredevil Who?

In celebration of the release of Daredevil #500 (and inspired by the great retrospective at The Weekly Crisis) I figured it was about time we talked about the scarlet swashbuckler himself. Namely, the five different alter egos of Daredevil.

1- Matt Murdock : The OG

Lawyer. Blind. Lots of dead girlfriends. You know the drill.

Moving on.

2- Mike Murdock : The Surprise Twin

Back in the swinging sixties, ol' hornhead decided that he needed to throw his co-workers off the scent of who he might be so he created Mike here. Mike was supposed to be the showboating, flirtatious, totally awesome, totally not blind twin brother of Matt, who decided to throw on the union suit to inject some much needed excitement in his life. If memory serves, Mike was so dreamy he ended up in a love triangle with Karen Page and his other self, Matt. Smart move there, buddy.

Not to worry, Mike was 'killed' in the line of duty not long after he showed up, leaving only a secure secret identity in it's wake. Oh, and the shattered psyche of a woman who had serious feelings for him, but it's not like that could lead to drugs, prostitution, or anything destructive in the future. Right?

3- Hellspawn : The Doppleganger

Are you ready for some convoluted Marvel continuity? Awesome, check this out:

Back in 1992 Marvel released a sequel to the totally amazingly awesome Infinity Gauntlet miniseries: The Infinity War. In it, evil doubles of all the Marvel heroes were created and sent out to fight they're respective inspiration. A couple of these dopplegangers stuck around after the crossover, Spider-Man's and Daredevil's.

Now, after a series of events that I don't want to remember, Matt was in trouble with the law and needed to do something drastic. So instead of just hitching it to a different country, or spending all his time in the backwaters of Alabama, he finds the body of his doppleganger and tosses it in a rail yard to be discovered by the cops.

Thankfully they kinda gloss over how Matt was able to convince the world years later that the corpse that was identified and verified as him wasn't him.

4- Jack Batlin : The Street Hustler

With Matt Murdock technically dead, he needed a new identity, so say hello to Jack Batlin. With a name derived from his father's fighting days, Jack became a totally not blind and totally edgy street hustler. Although technically he was supposed to be impersonating a new Daredevil, that if you're keeping track would have been the third in a series. Just goes to show that you can't keep a good devil down.

Later Matt goes clinically insane and ends up fighting his imaginary twin brother which leads to killing Jack Batlin forever. I guess girlfriends aren't the only thing that Matt buries.

5- Iron Fist : The Replacement

Finally we have good ol' Danny Rand, The Iron Fist, who took over the role as a favor to Matt (though Matt didn't know it) while he was on trial, accused of being Daredevil. He did a great job for the few months that he was on the job, finally relinquishing the role after some such activity that I can't find online and honestly haven't read yet. Most of my DD knowledge is from his first series.

All I know is that Iron Fist is the first replacement to not end up dead... for now.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Fantastic Founding Fathers

And we're back.

I know, I know, it's like I turned 28 and decided I was too good for this place. Totally not the case, you know, life just got in the way.

Anyway, in my absence I found one of the most amazing mashups I've ever seen that I'd like to share with you. I don't know who it's by (Although it looks like Art Adams) or where it originated from, but check this out:

Totally rad right?

Personally, if I were to make it a true Founding Fathers team, I would have made John Adams the HUman Torch, John Monroe as the Invisible Woman, and Ben Franklin as The Thing.

But really, an Abe Lincoln Thing and a Teddy Roosevelt Torch are pretty badass, and I wouldn't want to give them up for anything.

Monday, August 10, 2009

GI Joe: Real American Nerds

I love GI Joe.

Where some kids where all about their Transformers, or their Thundercats, I was all about my PSA-spewing, snake-fighting, mostly-American crew of special force fighters.

But let's think about Gi Joe Headquarters for a minute: You have all these people working and living together, cliques are totally going to form, right? You'd have the Popular Kids (Duke, Flint, Lady Jaye, Cover girl, etc), the Jocks (Big-Lob, Capt. Grid Iron, Fridge, etc), the Ninjas (Snake Eyes, Nunchuck, Scarlett, etc.) and, of course, the nerds.

But who would those nerds be?

Never fear, dear reader, because I've done my research and figured out who would be sitting at that nerd table. So without further ado, here's my list of the Eight Nerds in GI Joe:

So you get picked for the super special forces and then you refuse to use a gun, you're not going to make a lot of friends that way. Lifeline would be that guy who was constantly nagging anyone around him about the merits of diplomacy versus using a laser rifle when it comes to fighting Cobra, which would quickly earn him a table with the nerds, the only table that would listen to his rants.

With a name like Mainframe, is it a wonder that he's on this list? An MIT grad who's all about computers, sounds like a huge geek to me. Something tells me he's be more concerned with how many Gigabites he has free, than the size of his hard drive. If you know what I mean.

Dial Tone
Popular belief would be that this beret'd communications officer would be all about gossip, but a quick check of his filecard shows uncharted depths of nerdosity. Making crystals at 14? A CB and Ham radio enthusiast by age 17? Can you say, Lost virginity at 23? I'm betting he had more long distance friends than actual physical friends.

This newly-unretired communications officer would be the perfect foil for Dial Tone. Chances are they were friends from their past Ham Radio days. With his history in the media industry, he would probably finish off a mean A/V trio with Dialtone and Mainframe

Quietly rejected by the other cliques, Chuckles would become the silent, attractive mainstay of the nerd clique, not because he was nerdy in any way, but more because he didn't say anything to stop it from happening. He's a PSA waiting to happen.

A meticulously clean solider with a very unfortunate moniker. Am I wrong in assuming that those two things might be related? Maybe some kind of embarrassing reveal in the locker room as a new Joe recruit? I'm pretty convinced the 'drives real fast' story is just a cover the truth involving bad mexican food, some white boxers, and some incriminating pictures.

Of everyone listed, no one screams 'Bully Bait' more than Tripwire. I can totally see one of the popular kids (Probably Flint, that jerk) sneaking up behind Trip to force one of his spectacular spills. It probably takes all the willpower in the world to not spook him while he's messing with explosives.

The token girl of the group. With her reputation of being a bad luck charm, she would surely be rejected by all the other cliques leaving her with this band of misfits. She would probably be pining for the dreamy Lt. Falcon to whisk her away while ignoring the awkward flirtations from her fellow misfit Tripwire. Girls can be so dumb sometimes.

And now you know. And knowing is half the battle. The other half involves picking the right table to sit at during lunch. Also lasers.

All images swiped from, which is an amazing site that you should totaly TOTALLY check out if you're interested in GI Joe at all.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Special Chicago Comic Con Edition!


Nate Grey is back!

It almost makes me want to go back and read all my X-Man back issues. The shitty ones by Kavanaugh, not the good re-vamped ones by Ellis.

It seems like Chicago was the place to be this year for good comic announcements. Between this, Realm of the Kings,Jeff Parker as the new Thunderbolts writer, and a new S.W.O.R.D series, it looks like Marvel has some really awesome things lined up.

Maybe I should save up to go to Chicago next year instead of trying to go to San Diego...

Friday, August 7, 2009

Friday Night Fights Round 11!!

Hey kids! It's Friday Night and you know what that means: Gratuitous Violence!!

Let's see if I can top last weeks top-notch fight, shall we?

Tonight's fight is courtesy of my favorite horrible super-team, The New Defenders, in issue #131 of their series by Peter Gillis & J.M. DeMatteis and Alan Kupperberg. The Music, well, that should be obvious:

I Am The Walrus - The Beatles

I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.
See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they fly.

I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.

Koo-Koo Ka-choo.

Make sure you check out Spacebooger to see the rest of the entries and to cast your vote for the best fight this week!

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

A Platypus Robot Special Presention

Today's my birthday, so instead of the normal snark about comics, I want to share with you, dear reader something I truly love.

Behold the beautiful friendship of Baman and Piderman, it's crazy absurdity at it's best with tons of quotable lines.

Witness their first encounter:

Taste the love:

Dance and Sing with they're new jam band:

And finally, Learn higher mathematics:

Baman and Piderman.

The best thing you'll see today. You're welcome.

Monday, August 3, 2009

The Specatular Spider-Man

Hey Chuck, you know that new Spider-Man Cartoon you're looking for? Well look at this:

Back to the Future references aside, this is my new favorite show on TV. It's everything Spidey purists want Spidey to be: He's a High Schooler, with girl problems, and always seems to fall prey to the ol' Parker Luck. With inventive fights, witty banter, and crisp stylized animation, it's the Spider-Man Animated series that I've always wanted to see.

It's totally amazing and I can't stop recommending it to everyone I see. Do yourself a favor and find an episode to watch. It's all over the youtube, it's on Disney XD (which I didn't really know existed until a few weeks ago), or you can go out and buy the first season on DVD like I did. It's 100% worth it, I guarantee it!

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a first season to finish watching...

Friday, July 31, 2009

Friday Night Fights Round 10!

It's Friday and it's time for some violence!

For those of you not in the know, every Friday Spacebooger presents what he likes to call Fight Night Fights. It's been a tradition for a while and it's far past my time to throw my hat into the ring, and I finally found an appropriate fight for this 'fight music' round.

Tonight's fight come courtesy of Scud: The Disposable Assassin #14, by the always blood-drenched (I'm guessing) Rob Schrab and Dan Harmon.

Yeah, let's give him some music. How about a little Gap Band. Namely: You Dropped a Bomb on Me.

You were the girl that changed my world
You were the girl for me
You lit the fuse, I stand accused
You were the first for me
But you turned me out, baby

Take it Scud Lite!

Good times! Now that's a way to start a weekend!

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The Fantastic Four...

will force you to take their drugs.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Things I missed in San Diego in Three Panels

Or, you know, pictures. Whatever. I make the rules here, I can do what I want!


Marvel's Marvelman Announcement.
I mean, it's only the biggest announcement to come out of San Diego in years. Finally I can finally get my hands on the end of the Alan Moore run.


2- The World Premiere of Iron Man 2 Footage.

Somehow it doesn't look as polished as the first one. I hope they can save it in post.

3- Uh... Not much really. I don't know if it was because I've been overly busy the past few days or what, but I wasn't really jazzed about anything coming out of San Diego this year. I'm intrigued by World War Hulks, but for all the wrong reasons; I really want to see the Avatar footage, but I know a trailer will be out in a month; and I would really like to get those new X-Factor Minimates, but it's not the can't-wait-to-have-it set of fall 09. I don't know what happened, but it seems like there was a lot of hype coming into San Diego this year, but not a lot of substance.

It's probably all them Twilight kids fault. We'll just blame them for the whole thing.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Fantastic Fiftieth Post!

Can you believe it, I'm a regular blogger at this point, Who woulda thunk it? So in celebration of my fiftieth post, I thought I'd post all the fiftieth issues I have in my collection. Lucky for you!

Wolverine # 50 was one of the first special issues I ever got. I remember reading it over and over again as a kid as I tried to figure out who this Logan guy was. Little did I know that he was just some punk farm kid from Canada, and not a badass from birth. Sigh...

I remember I bought this because I had some extra money and it was shiny. I still contend that one day it might be worth something.

Yeah, there was a span there when I was a Spawn kid. As a matter of fact, right around the time this came out, I sat down and read the entire series up until this point. It was pretty alright I remember, but everything hinged on the one issue I didn't have, Issue # 4. I feel like after this issue everything devolved to Spawn somehow moving deeper and deeper into the alleys and constantly complaining that people were coming to him to help. Oh Spawn, the apathetic hero to dwindling thousands, how do you do it?

The first appearance of Post! OMG! POST! He's totally going to be the next big thing. Bigger than Bishop! Bigger than Cable! Bigger than Gambit! Bigger than... Oh. He's dead now, never mind.

I honestly don't remember what this one was about and I'm too lazy to read it. we'll just move on.

Ugh... Double pass. I think this was that period that I was still getting X-Man but I didn't know why. The less said about this the better.

The start of my four year run on Spider-Girl and the beginning of the end of the greatness of the title. But really solid stuff in this issue that got me hooked for a while.

Technically I own this in trades, so I might not know what happens exactly in this issue, but I'm sure it involves some great revelations, some witty dialogue, and ends with a knockout cliffhanger. I miss BKV books, I wish he'd come back to comics...

Another one of those technical owns via trades, but I know what happens in this one. Kirkman shows the freedom you can have with creator-owned stuff and shakes everything up for his anniversaries.

Not as extreme as the last Kirkman book, but it was still a pretty big status quo change. I wish Mark didn't change his costume though.

Okay, and technically I don't have this one either, but what's an anniversary post without some Galactus action going on? Right?

Here's to at least Fifty more, I think I got at least another three months worth of blogging left in me.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Your Monthly Dose of Throg!!

Throg shows off his greatest power in the latest issue of Pet Avengers: The Look.

The lesson: Don't ever question the Frog of Thunder.

Monday, July 20, 2009

Galacta: Daughter of Galactus

Get ready for the internet's next big sensation, Galacta is getting her own digital series.

For those not in the know, Galacta first appeared a few months ago in the Assistant Editor Presents specials in a short 9=page story written by Adam Warren. The story goes that she's the web2.0-savvy, 20-something looking, normal sized daughter of everyone's favorite planet devouring force of nature. But instead of just eating whatever she comes across, Galacta is a tad more picky with what she eats. Imagine it this way: Galactus would be the kind of guy to hit up a Sizzler for it's All-You-Can-Eat buffet, while Galacta would rather devour smaller, but more tasty morsels at a Wolfgang Puck's or a Mario Batali's.

Should be a fun book. And if you're too cheap to sign up for Marvel's Digital Comics, don't fret, it ought to be released in good ol' fashioned print before too long.

Until then I should start thinking of another one of these that involve Galactus' daughter: